• Tori

3 Life Lessons From a Life Coach

1. What you focus on multiplies

Have you noticed when you focus all of your thoughts, energy and expectations on being broke and miserable you feel broke and miserable? Or maybe you've experienced one of those days where everything just seems to go wrong, a day where you’ve told yourself and those around you that you're having a bad day.

The same can be said for filling yourself with happy, carefree thoughts resulting in a happy carefree day or badass boss thoughts leading you through a badass boss day or zenned out peaceful thoughts allowing you a zenned out peaceful day.

The truth is where your attention and focus goes energy flows. And what's even better is that you get to decide what this is.

The natural laws of the Universe tell us that like attracts like and therefore the energy you hold in your body, in your mindset and in your soul is the energy you attract in. It doesn't matter if this energy is good, bad or indifferent, what you put out into the world is going to be what you get back in return.

This means if you are stressed out of your mind, focusing on how stressed you feel, how tight your budget is, how much work you have to do today, chances are your day is going to be filled with stress, expenses and a long-ass to-do list.

On the other hand, if you choose to focus on the good, finding gratitude for the people you love, the roof over your head and the job you get paid to do, chances are your day will roll out a whole lot smoother.

For me, I used to work as a stressed-out corporate lawyer, constantly complaining and overthinking about how stressful and miserable my job was. As a result, I was faced with almost daily challenges, emphasizing how stressful, miserable and awful my job was.

I would wake up in the morning and immediately stress over my long to-do list only to find my usual train had been cancelled or I had to cover my colleague's work for a day or the courts were running extra slow that day. Do you see the pattern?

Now, I’ve learned to focus instead on the potential, the magic and the beauty within each day. I encourage my clients to wake up and spend the first thirty minutes to an hour of their day doing something they love, something that sets their mood and the tone for the rest of their day. Whether it’s reading a good book, getting a good sweat on or spending time in nature, try it for yourself for seven days and see what happens.

2. Anything is possible if you try

Do you have a big, scary, crazy dream that you’ve tucked away and hidden from sight because it feels unattainable? Imagine for a second what your life could look like one year from now, five years from now if you started putting in the time and effort to making this dream come true?

Imagine where you could be living, who you could be sharing your life with and what your day-to-day would look like.

Now imagine, what your life will look like this time next year if you don't do anything. If you don't try.

Building on the lesson above, what could happen if you chose to back yourself, to believe in your dreams and put in the effort to build the life you want. Think of the infinite potential available to you, if you just put one foot in front of the other and simply try to make your dreams come true.

Now, breaking your goal down into tiny, bite-sized steps, what can you do today or this week to start the ball rolling? What information do you need to know, which people could you start talking to and how can you inch yourself closer to where you want to be?

While working as a corporate lawyer, I used to daydream of travelling the world and getting paid. I had no idea how I could make this work, no specific skills to put into place and no clear plan, but I knew I wanted this freedom lifestyle. Instead of boxing up my dreams and letting them collect dust in the back of my mind, I chose to build my savings, quit my job and book a one-way ticket to Greece. Fast forward two and a half years, I’m now living in Mexico, working online and travelling the world just as I dreamed.

This life didn’t happen instantly, but I chose, again and again, to back myself, to pursue my dreams and try my best until I got what I wanted. When things got challenging, I took a step back to remind myself of what I wanted and why it was important to me and then I continued in the direction I dreamed of going.

Working with my clients, I encourage them to do the same, break down their goals and dreams into small achievable steps then move towards them day by day, only pausing to stop and remind themselves of what they want and why, but never giving up.

3. You get to create your own reality every single day

Building on lessons one and two, my favourite life lesson to date is simply knowing that I get to create my own reality every single day.

I get to choose where I put my focus, the energy I hold in my mind and body and the experiences I attract each day.

I get to put in the effort to what I want to create and move towards this.

I get to create the reality I want, each and every day.

And so do you.

When I’m feeling low or drained or stressed or sad, I allow myself time to process my emotions and then I choose to move through them. I shake them off, re-centre myself in the activities I love and I keep showing up for myself and my dreams.

When I’m feeling confused or lost or frustrated with circumstances beyond my control, I realign my focus with that which I can control. AKA myself.

And when I’m feeling motivated, inspired and energized I channel these emotions into my dreams, goals and direction moving forward. Taking time to write, connect, network and create from the energy of infinite potential and self-belief.

Creating your own reality is as simple as taking ownership of your reality, recognizing that you hold the reigns and only you can truly direct the path ahead of you. While there will undoubtedly be setbacks, road bumps and lessons to learn along the way, with each situation that arises you get to choose how you respond. You get to decide if this is the place you give up or if you can find a solution that suits you and your needs. You get to decide if this is a failure or simply another opportunity to grow, learn and redefine the direction in which you're going.

Choosing to be empowered by your circumstances, your life experiences to date and everything yet to come in front of you can be the difference between living your life by someone else’s rules or creating your own.

Taking ownership of your life, your experiences and your effort can be the difference between living a life you love and living the life you’ve been handed without ever asking questions or taking the initiative to shake things up.

If you’re unhappy with your current reality, let this be your invitation to change. Do something differently, be more aware of your thoughts, emotions and energy, put yourself and your dreams first.

And if you’re struggling on this path (which we all do at some point) reach out for some help. Invest in a life coach, chat with a friend, read a good book, simply decide that everything you desire is available to you, then make it happen — no excuses!

This is your life and only you can truly make it whatever you desire.

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